Does Porn Need Storylines? By Liselle |
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It's a frosty Saturday night in London, so I've decided to have a cosy, quiet and naughty evening in. Provisions required: a decent glass of red, no disruptions (mobile is off) and 1, or even 2 raunchy films of my choice. |
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 OK, my choice... This is the tricky bit. |
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Option A - Elaborate Epics: Porn disguised as genre flicks. E.g. a 'no-pants period drama'. Ideal porn for couples, as guys can watch it with their girlfriends because 'it ain't really porn, luv. Honest.' |
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Option B - Girl-friendly Porn (whatever the hell that means - more on this in later blogs): For now, this illusive term means films with higher production values, stylish settings, some characterisation and hotter-than-average (male) 'talent'. Hurrah! In reality, it can sometimes mean a couple of semi-naked ladies caressing each other with feathers, while the only man in the room is wasted on blowing into a saxophone. Beware of the latter, unless you don't actually like sex (or really like jazz). |
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Option C - Four-letter-keyword Quickies: Bespoke and to the point. Sometimes this hits the spot because it does exactly what it says on the filthy little tin. Plus, occasionally we just want to skip straight to the messy stuff. |
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 And so it begins... Rifling through the Option As, I seem drawn to the titles that make me laugh. Focus, Liselle! You wanted to be turned on, not cheered up. Perhaps the comedy storyline appeases some porn-guilt I never realised I had. I guess a good, cheesy spoof can make anything seem less offensive - even bad scriptwriting and exposed genitals. Laughter makes the conscience lighter, perhaps? |
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Despite this, I'm not in the mood for humour. So, onto something more serious: Option B. Now the "quality" stuff is tempting, as I'm partial to charm and context... and there is value in professional lighting. BUT will all the glamour, gloss and storyline prevent me from relating to the sex? It could simply be a beautiful waste of time and quite literally, an anti-climax. |
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Which brings me to the no frills, no shame, Option C. If it's porn I want, then maybe I should just get stuck in there with my dirty keywords and be done with it. |
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 But is that really all I want? What about sexual tension, seduction, fantasy, or even just a bit of foreplay? Surely, I need porn with a storyline! |
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At this point, I realise that instead of having my naughty night in, I have, in fact, conducted valuable porn research and self-analysis. Impressive. However, I've also finished the wine and can now hear the cat squeaking at me from the living room. |
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So, re-focussing, I write this blog and email my friends to find out their thoughts on the matter. Below are some of the good and bad things about storylines in porn. |
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The Good: Storylines can... 1. Cater for both her and him 2. Add a sense of reality, empathy, and fantasy 3. Act as 'foreplay', raising our expectation and teasing us 4. Build tension and chemistry between the performers 5. Ease us in to a hardcore scene, or get us in the mood 6. Be used as a mechanism to move the action on, change location, or introduce new characters 7. Add variety to our porn collections |
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The Bad: Storylines can... 1. Waste time when you just want to get to the action 2. Add comedy, which can be a big turn-off 3. Be limited by the performers' (lack of) talent 4. Distract us from the sex 5. Cause us practical problems (fast-forwarding is tricky when your hands are busy) 6. Build up too much sexual expectation and cause an anti-climax 7. Allow directors to sometimes neglect the actual sex in favour of elaborate plot, set and dialogue |
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So all you lovely readers out there, what do you think? TELL US HOW IT REALLY IS! |
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